This is a guest post from LocksmithsInSydney.com. These guys have saved my skin numerous times. They also have a good sense of humour.
I’ve seen some funny things during my time as a locksmith. People get locked out. You forget your keys.
Imagine the scene: It’s the middle of the night. You are taking the garbage out, and a gust of wind slams the front door shut.
You just locked yourself out.
So there you are stuck in your pyjamas, on your front door step. Damn.
After 5 minutes of frustration, you do the standard checking of windows to see if you left anything open. Nope, your security-conscious-self did a great job. It is at this moment that you realise you are definitely locked out.
Now, most people tend to get some help at this point. Go over to a neighbours house? Call someone to let you in?
There are defining moments in a guy’s life. At this moment, you could surrender to your circumstances and ask for help, or you could rise to the challenge and get in touch with your inner Jason Bourne.
Sadly, in these circumstances some people like to rise to the challenge and decided they would break into their own home.
Here are the three attempts I consistently see when I’m called to a lockout.
Attempt #1: Break Through The Door Window
I have a theory. The first question people must ask themselves when locked out is “If I were a robber how would I break into my own home?”.
The answer: Crack open a window and slip in.
Most people forget to lock their garage door. Bad for security, great if you need access to some tools.
Every secret agent has to have his gadgets right?
Their gadget of choice: a flat head screw driver.
How do I know? It’s pretty obvious when it is still jammed in the lock or window.
So here is the idea. They would insert the head of the screwdriver underneath the bottom of the window pane. Most think that they would be able to wiggle it and force the window upward. They would open the window and climb in.
Sounds simple, right?
Not so. Darkness and people’s obvious lack of hand-eye coordination results in a damaged window pane, and still no entry. I’ve even had people try to loosen the window by trying it from the sides.
Nope, just more damage. This is usually when people give up and call someone.
For those determined folks, it’s time for Plan B.
Attempt #2: Open The Door With A Plastic Card
You’ve seen this in movies, so it has to work right?
The idea behind this is to use a card to open the spring bolt on the lock.
Some people use an old piece of plastic lying around in the garage. Others usually use a plastic card from their wallet.
The plan is to wedge the card between the door and the frame. The spring bolt is often triangle shaped and found just above the handle of the door. The idea is to push the card in and bend it away from the door knob. When you feel the card slide the latch back, turn the handle and voila! you are in.
As it turns out, the result is most people are left jiggling the piece of plastic in the middle of the night trying to get their door to unlock. After 10 minutes, most people have had enough.
But for the true diehards, they go one step further.
Attempt #3: Climb Through The Roof
When I see the results of these attempts, a story of my childhood came to mind. When I was a teen I got locked out of the house and my parents weren’t home. We had a balcony on the second story that my parents often left unlocked. It was difficult to get to with a ladder because there was a thorny bush under the balcony.
However, I had the brilliant idea of using the ladder to get onto the roof. I would climb over the house and drop down onto the second story balcony below.
I grabbed the ladder, climbed up onto the roof and, as I was getting my footing, I could see my mum driving down the street. I knew my mum wouldn’t be impressed with my roof-top antics so I quickly ran over the roof and dropped onto the second story balcony below.
Thankfully they had left the back door unlocked. I could come up with a story to explain the ladder, no way could I explain locking myself out on the second story balcony.
Most people don’t have a second story balcony that they may have left unlocked, however, some have their own creative means of entry. Many people think that they can take off the tiles on their roof and let themselves in that way.
In short: You can’t. And in the dark, it is not a good idea.
The Final Solution
After these inner secret agents have had a battering, many people succumb and called up a professional.
Just image the scene. You rock up to the call out. The customer is there slightly flushed in the face (breaking in is hard work), the epitome of style in his fluffy slippers, flannelet pyjamas, and baby blue bedrobe asking you to let you in. The window is damaged, there is a card stuck in the door and a bunch of tiles are missing from the roof.
James Bond right there.
Most people can have a great sense of humour at this time, but save yourself the trouble and call a locksmith.